I’m fortunate enough to be at an institution on the quarter system, and one that starts early enough in September that by this time of year grading is a distant memory. But many of those I know aren’t so lucky. I was talking to my brother on the phone this weekend and the subject of his not-yet-finished grading came up. Always trying to make the best of things my brother started a Dr. Seuss-like rhyme about it. I burst out laughing and promised him that I would expand on his idea as a blog post. So I give you my tribute to Dr. Seuss started and inspired by my brother and dedicated to all those struggling with final papers, exams, and projects.

There they sit.

The final exam. The final project. The final paper.

Grade me, they speak. Grade me, they sing. Grade me, they suggest.

I do not want to grade I say.

I do not way to grade today.

I do not want to grade on the train.

I do not want to grade on the plane.

I do not want to grade in the house.

I do not want to grade with a mouse.

I do not want to grade as I walk.

I do not want to grade while I talk.

I do not want to grade before lunch.

I do not want to grade after brunch.

I do not want to grade in the sun.

I do not want to grade everyone.

I do not want to grade as I sit.

I do not want to grade even a tiny bit.

But my students wait for me.

So while I clearly disagree.

I will grade them all, one, two, three.

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